Pregnancy, delivery, and breast feeding have changed me a lot in various aspect. I gain weight, my breast are deformed, stretch marks at tummy and breast area and my body is weaker. Mental part, I am always in sleep deprive stage, always having needle poke feeling in breast, breast engorgement, feeling stress due to lesser milk supply, responsibility of taking care of my son. Despite of all these, my son come from my womb and why in this society, he is not taking my surname? Why he belongs to Tan family, the man who just donate a sperm, pay part of the bill and taking care of my son when he is free? It's easy for him to say, like to take all the credits for such little things that he has done. And he even wanna share my legacy because he is my husband and he love me?! I rather leave it only for my son...

Marriage life is getting lesser and lesser appealing. A lot of time, I can't feel the passion nor happiness. Most of the time, it's only left routine schedule and unchanged attitude from him.

The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

I have read this poem during my secondary school, at that time, I thought I understand well about the message the poem trying to convey. However, when I come to this stage of life, been through lots of up and down, then only I realised, with these few sentences, the poem has tell it all about life. I have chosen the one most people travelled, but recently questioning myself frequently whether is this the most suitable or most wanted for me...